Making strange things for strange heads

Posted by on Wednesday, March 9th, 2005

This wiseguy gets it.  The Maus gets it.  What, you don’t get it?

Wanna speed on the appearance of strange hats in your neighborhood?
Mad hatter the first has one hell of a hat in her living room and another in the sneaky sneaky works, and a head full of amazing shapes blooming like flowers after cavorting with other fullers at the ACC show. Mad Hatter the second may soon create a crimson crest for . . . someone who already has a crimson crest? That second hatter is mad, indeed. She needs to stay away from the mercury.

The madness has spread all the way to Knit Picks, yarn purveyors who have decided to stop making a profit, best I can tell. Wanna see more hats sooner?
A. Measure your friends’ heads well and often. If everyone gets measured, no one will be expecting the unexpected.
2. Go through your closets looking for cast off 100% wool sweaters marked dry clean only. Wash them in the hottest water you can make. Dry them in a hot dryer. Laugh at how much they shrink.  Give ’em to me.
III. Buy the food that felt eats, and deliver it unto a hatter:

a han
a do
a tri

A brownie’s hat needs 7 skeins to grow up stout and sure.
A witch’s hat eats two times that, as does a warlock’s tur.
A stately fez eats modestly, but 4 or 5 skeins full.
A dread-locked dome, the madman’s home, sups but snips of wool.
A tangle of the ewe’s coat falls and twirls betwixt the pins,
And hatters full a rainbow mound to sidhe-helms for their kin.


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